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Each January, countless people approach the new year with fresh goals and hopeful intentions, only to feel deflated within weeks when things don’t stick. The enthusiasm fades, plans unravel, and shame creeps in. In his latest blog, EMDR therapist and trauma-informed life coach Roger Hughes offers a thoughtful, grounded exploration of why this happens, not from a place of blame or failure, but from a place of understanding.
Rather than pointing to laziness or a lack of discipline, the article looks at how the nervous system plays a central role in change. Hughes highlights how pressure, timelines, and self-judgement—often embedded in New Year’s culture, can activate stress responses rather than support growth. For people with trauma histories or ongoing emotional load, the body may resist forced change not because it’s broken, but because it’s protecting. The piece gently unpacks the disconnect between the cultural push for transformation and the body’s deeper need for safety and readiness.
What makes this article particularly valuable is how it bridges psychological insight with everyday experience. It names the hidden emotional costs of self-improvement culture—shame, guilt, inner criticism—and suggests that healing doesn’t start with trying harder, but with listening differently. Hughes doesn’t offer quick fixes. Instead, he invites readers to consider a kinder model of change—one that starts with pacing, compassion, and attunement to what the body actually needs.
For therapists, this blog may resonate with what clients bring into early January sessions: overwhelm, fatigue, and the fear of falling short. For curious readers, it offers reassurance that the struggle to change isn’t a personal flaw—it’s a signal that more support or a different approach might be needed.
You can read the full article, The Real Reason Your New Year’s Resolutions Fail — And What No One Talks About, on rogerhughes.org.
